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#SleepyPhilosophy - 5. Love Saturday, 2 April 2016 | 0 comment[s] "What is love?" "A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person." (Dictionary.com) But what's the point of calling it "love" when so many people in this generation get it mixed up with the thing called "lust"? Awhile ago, my friend told me that she came to the conclusion that lust is just a crush, a short term eye candy that you want. Whereas love is something deeper, something more meaningful. You want to create a future with that person. It's something that you can feel deep in the pits of your body. It's like an exhilaration of emotions whenever you talk to them; it's that shock whenever you touch them; it's that smile on your face whenever you think about them; it's when your heart just swells with this bubbly feeling whenever you see their smile. That, in my opinion, is when you're in love. But really, no one really "feels love" at the very start of the relationship. It takes perhaps months for it to go from "innocent crush" to "passionate affection". At the beginning of the relationship you haven't developed anything major just yet. Yes, you've entered a commitment with someone but the thing is that you haven't fully determined if they'll turn... "crazy" on you. You've yet to fully find out who that person is. People do have certain standards and when they find out that their current partner doesn't have the qualities that they want then they just... STEREOTYPICALLY lose feelings. They just don't like certain aspects of them so they slowly losing that affection that they held dearly for them. If you truly love someone you'll accept them wholeheartedly. Flaws and all. Perhaps there will be certain flaws that you can't accept and that's acceptable. That's okay. It's human to dislike things. But if you claim to stop liking a person just because you don't like certain aspects of them... Then you're not in love. Instead of losing feelings maybe you could've reminded them or reprimanded them that what they're doing is bad. Talk to them. Communication is a vital and the key to a healthy relationship. Just wholeheartedly accepting everything won't allow the relationship to progress and become stronger. It'll just become a standstill where you're just circling the experiences over and over again. In my opinion, relationships are there to help you grow and develop into a better person. That's why you need to be able to have those necessary fights no matter how awful they are - because those are the things that help us grow. So basically love is something that we fundamentally need because that is something that makes us human. For each and every person, they interpret it differently so perhaps, their vision of "love" is something different altogether. All I can say is that "love" is something we should all strive to find one day in our lives.
Requested by Mr. K.
#SleepyPhilosophy - 4. Family Saturday, 26 March 2016 | 0 comment[s] "What's the important thing to have in a family?" For every individual they have a different definition of family and as a result the "most important thing" is different for everyone. It could be trust, belonging, commitment, bonds, help. From what I've been told having trust is the most important thing to have. Because with trust everything else runs much more smoothly. With trust the members of the "family" can believe in each other. Because we "trust" each other, we don't need to worry about what the other would do. We're not anxious because we "trust" them. We "trust" them to make us feel like we belong - like they're part of our family. But what if they broke that trust? Without thinking much of what they did the just... Broke it? It's like, figuratively, the wall that you had put up to keep people out - the wall that you had taken down specifically for them, was stomped on. All of a sudden you don't know what to do. This person you thought of as a family member were to suddenly turn your back on you, what do you do then? The thing is that people nowadays trust people too easily and as a result, when someone betrays them they develop what we call "trust issue". I'm not saying that it's wrong to trust people too easily but the thing is, in MY opinion, the whole "family" category that we put our friends in... Shouldn't be asked for. They should earn it. Like, there's no point in asking, "Oh, do you want to be part of the family?" There's really no reason in it. Because for one, if you're being asked to be "put into a family" you're joining your friend's circle of friends. Perhaps there's someone in there that you don't exactly get along with and you had intended to stay away from them but because you "accepted" to be "put into a family" you're now "family" with them. And then because of that you don't exactly know them too well - you don't know how they'd act or what they'd do. Sure you could "put them before you" but you don't know if they'd do the same for you. That's the issue with asking people for permission to be a "family". It's better off to just let it happen naturally. That way you'll get to know the person who you want to be part of your "family" and you'll just automatically connect. I'm just saying that in MY opinion, people shouldn't be too caught up with the family ordeal. Yeah, I know that people take things kind of things seriously - especially people who cherish bonds. And I get that. I understand that those kind of things makes them happy. But I'm just thinking that maybe, just maybe, don't do things with your heart on your sleeve because all that does is get hurt. I'm probably being biased 'cause of my past experience but with time, those kind of pain eventually fade away and you'll find new people as long as you choose to open up. There's no point in dwelling in the past. Just let it go.
Requested by Mr. K and Mr. EK.
#SleepyPhilosophy - 3. Lost Love Saturday, 19 March 2016 | 0 comment[s] "Why do people want to go back to a relationship that they ended?" At first (normally for guys) it's because they miss that lack of support that was there. For guys, having a girl by their side is like an anchor for them. They support them, encouraged them and was always there at the end of the day if the boys ever needed someone to go to. And once that girl is gone all that's left is just emptiness. A certain void - the lack of having someone who understood yet never judged them. So when guys want to get back into a relationship that they once lost it's stereotypically because they just want someone to be there for them again. Because it's apparently "gay" to rant their feelings to other guys so the only choice is to turn to a girl. But boys have this mind set to keep cool and independent (usually) so they won't do it to just anyone. Only to their girl but what if their girl is gone? Then they want her back because they just want to fill in that emptiness. Likewise, when it's the girl who wants to get back it's generally something similar to what guys want. But they miss the comfort instead, the love that they received, the special treatment that they got. They want to fill that loneliness that they could only a partner could give. They want to create more memories together with the partner - because if it's one thing that a girl treasures (as long as they have a clean break up without any poisonous feelings) then it's the memories. The time and effort that they've given to someone is irreplaceable. But overall, there could be other factors that could contribute in wanting a past lover back. And that, is something that we, as a human, cannot control. Especially our emotions. And heart.
Requested by Mr. K.
#SleepyPhilosophy - 2. Void Wednesday, 9 March 2016 | 0 comment[s] How do people deal with the emptiness inside them? Alright. I have some friends who I'd like to write this post for. Mr. E.K and Mr. D who doesn't blog anymore and just left his own blog quite dead. First of all when we lose something we have this emptiness inside of us - something that used to be filled with whatever that we lost. May it be love, trust or respect. It's mainly love so I'll focus on that in this case. Sure you can do many things to fill up that void. You can go around making girls fall for you left and right, filling up that hole only temporarily only to lose it all over again when you're done playing around. That void inside you just can't be filled up by something that can be easily lost. Things that we place within ourselves are generally things that are genuine and hard to acquire. It's like trying to fix a brick wall with wooden planks. What's the point of doing that if the enemy can easily charge straight through? I won't say that time won't heal it but it will close it only just a bit. Do you know why? Because during those times you would've gained new experiences, made new memories with friends, discovered new hobbies. All these things that can contribute into closing that gap. Sure you can find other things to temporarily close it but what's the point if it reopens again? That's the problem with temporary solutions. They only last for so long whereas memories and experiences are things that are usually kept for a long time (unless you forget easily then I can't help you with that sadly). Now, what's the point of trying to fill that gap inside of you if what you're doing is only making it hurt even more? There's no point. You're just doubling your pain. All I can say is stop because the love you want isn't just there. You'll need to accept it and move on. It'll be hard like hell (it always will be) but that strengthens your heart. There's honestly no point in doing whatever you're doing to fill up that abyss if it's just causing more pain 'cause it'll also affect not only your mental state but also your physical state. The pain makes us not want to eat. It'll make our body weaker. Although the brain and body says "yes, we need this" the heart says no because whenever you're in pain it's generally the heart that takes the brute of it. All I can really say is to find things to not temporarily fill the WHOLE void up but things that will permanently close it - just by a slither is fine. And if it hurts then stop. There's no point in hurting you even more. It'll hurt now but gradually over time you will make it as "there's always light at the end of the tunnel". #SleepyPhilosophy - 1. People Sunday, 28 February 2016 | 0 comment[s] "What if people could understand each other?" You know, it would be nice if people could understand each other. If they did then we wouldn't have to deal with all the misunderstandings; we wouldn't have to fight; we wouldn't have to hurt others; the suicide rate would be so much more lower. If people could then discrimination wouldn't happen. But we can't because that's how society is. In order to make one feel better of themselves they usually put another one down. All this fighting is utter nonsense if they serve no purpose. For example, what's the point of making all this stuff up just because you don't want that person to come along? Just be straight up about it and the latter party can try to be understanding. Things like that serve no purpose because not only are you making the other party look bad, you're unknowingly giving yourself a bad name once people find out that what all you said was utter lies. There's just no point in doing that. It would be so much more lovely if people could understand each other. Then they would know if there's a certain line they must not cross — resulting in less anger-filled world. I won't say that anger will be gone but it will be subsided. There wouldn't be as much grudges as there are now. If people they could understand each other than there would be less people on the streets - people would be more giving. They'd understand what would happen. Maybe they could be: "Oh, I understand that you couldn't do anything about being unemployed. I understand that it's hard to do the things you want if you're living off others' scraps. Oh, here's some money to help make your life a bit easier." Sparing a bit of money isn't hard to do. Maybe just a dollar or two can buy them a meal. If people could understand each other then they would know how hard it would be to living on the streets, under perhaps a park bench with everyone else looking down their noses at you. If you want faith to be restored in humanity then maybe it should begin with you. But then again, if you think about it. How do relationships grow? It's through fighting and then reaching a mutual understanding where one's relationship will become stronger. Because if you fight then sure, it'll seem like a painful thing but the end result is that your relationship will be better as a result since you'll know that person better. Fights are where people can get a better look at the other at a deeper level. Fighting has two outcomes: for the better or for the worst. Let me take couples for example. They can fight and fight but what's the point of fighting if their relationship doesn't grow? What's the point if they don't reach a consensus? If they just fight without any solid result then they're just hurting themselves. Result? They split, looking for other people to give their heart to. But that's for the worst. If they fought and reached an agreement then their bond will grow. And who knows, maybe it'll reach the point where they'll tie the knot. And from my point of view, personally? Fighting is necessary in order to keep a relationship strong, stable and not... "tedious" in some cases. So don't fight for no reason but fight when it's necessary. It's okay to be understanding and accepting but if you do it all the time... It'll just be the same repeat over and over again.
Suggested by Mr. K.
#SleepyPhilosophy Saturday, 20 February 2016 | 0 comment[s] Alrightiooooo. So I got suggested to do this thing where I post deep stuff on my blog and while I was giving advice to my friend, I was quite sleepy so I came up with that headline HAHAHAHA So starting from now I'll post some "deep" stuff once a week or something like depending if I get any prompts because well, I can't type on the whim. I need a reason otherwise my brain doesn't function quite well. So if you have any suggestions just comment in that box towards your left... Yeah, that blue one right there, and I'll check it and I'll post something in relation to it. :) But in other news, this new template took me two-three hours to finish. Well, three but I took a shower so it's two HAHAHA. But seriously, I need help. I've dug a hole too deep for this person. Even surgery at this rate won't be able to save me. HAHAHAHA Much love for him <3 幸せ // 2015 Thursday, 18 February 2016 | 0 comment[s] Happiness. // 2015
So like, hey. It's been awhile since I've posted anything on here really. I felt like updating today to be honest but then again... By "today" it'll just end up being updating bits and pieces then posting the post days, weeks if not months later. HAHAHAHA. Oh wells, it's a bad habit you should be able to recognise now. (・ω・)ノ
Firstly, let's start off with a summary of term one. Despite it only being one term, it was flat out hectic! I think it was the second week of school? But we had swimming carnival. For that day I wore my incomplete Meiko costume and because I forgot my belt, I couldn't adjust the height of my skirt. :( It honestly was too high for my liking but luckily, I had bike shorts 'cause I got told a week later I think, that it was really up high. LOL.
School photos in the same week. It's funny because it's the last year so people would normally think that I'd try harder for the school photos. Heh, funny joke I got so lazy so I just tied it up and left it like that and took a really messy photo. But then again, we had really bad photographers this year so yeah LMFAO.
There was Valentines' Day next. It was so busy selling roses. I eventually lost majority of my break selling and thus didn't get to eat much really. However, it was all worth it when we sold nearly all of it. :) The process of wrapping them up, sorting them out as well were extremely stressful! But we eventually finished, two hours at least faster than the previous year which I personally think was a huge achievement considering it only took us four hours!! So good! Good job to everyone who was there but like everyone else has said: Shout out to my little sister for wrapping up approximately 400 roses! Little does she know, and I may not show it, but I'm proud of this little one. Especially with her achievements and all. :')
Leaders' Retreat happened and I must say, I do somewhat regret it considering that I missed out on two days of school. Considering that the Thursday consists of all my core subjects of Maths B, Chemistry, English and Maths A. D: It didn't help that I also missed out on Friday's maths b either. I had to really catch up. And the funny thing was that I am pretty sure that I am the only one out of the whole leaders' retreat who brought homework to camp. HAHAHAHAHA. But hey, it was interesting to know that I was the only one cooped up in their room for half the time trying to rewrite notes for Chemistry. LOLOL. Then again... I kind of wanted to play pool... :( But we did do a lot of activities at the retreat and they were really cool! Took a whole bunch of photos with the girls in my cabin through Phuong-Uyen's camera (holy crap dude. I am in so much LMFAO). She like, took one of me in the process of tying up my hair and to be frank... It's kind of embarrassing really. Because like, I guess it's because you can see my outline? LOL. I dunno, I just get embarrassed to those type of things yet I don't get embarrassed from flashing people. Oh gees, something is most definitely wrong with me. LOL. But all in all, I made friends with my two favourite girls in grade eight: Lili and Yifei!! They're two such cutie patooties. Seriously. The food there was alright really, sometimes better than I expected, sometimes worse than I expected. Oh, there was a time where I was jumping up and down 'cause I was feeling bloated right? Next thing I know it, I had a whole line following suit. So weird yet strangely hilarious. :') At night when we were meant to all sleep... We didn't sleep. LOL. The girls in my cabin started a deep and meaningful conversation circle and I must say, it really did get emotional. Haha. I told them about my past relationship 'cause I guess I kind of wanted to see if I could get it off my chest if I could say it out loud... And it helped, despite it leaving me somewhat choking at the end. HAHAHA. But one of the girls were like "But that's in the past right? Do you like someone now?" My response... "To be honest, I think I do..." But thinking about it now, I was in that phase where I really did have a thing for him. Totemo hazukashii desu. But it's true. 'Cause I couldn't not stop talking to him at the retreat until 12 and I had to force myself to go to sleep. HAHAHAHA. Embarrassingly, I went to sleep with a smile that night. :$ But during the retreat, it was raining quite heavily to the point that we were at risk of getting flooded so we had to go home about a hour earlier than usual. We got back, and I crashed my Japanese class. Literally jumped onto the window and went: "HI GUYSSSS!" HAHAHAHAHA. SCARED THEM SO BAD :D. Was so much fun. And then it was home time. Oh, I kinda teased my crush at the time after school and was like: "Where's my welcome back hug huh?" His response: "I would've, except your mum was there." Made me smile. Hehe. :3 But yeaaahhhh. All in all, I don't regret going to the Leaders' Retreat, I just wished that they had put it at a better time considering it was in the middle of term. :(
The following event that I'm going to describe now is something that I'm going to hold really dear to me so it gets its very own paragraph hehe. So basically: 27 February, it was Tet. Normally I wouldn't expect much but I this year I hung out with a couple of friends (we went on rides and stuff) before I eventually ditched them. :') Sorry guys. The reason why I ditched them was because of my crush. I kind of forced him to come sooooo... HAHAHA. :$ Umm, so basically we hung out after he went to go buy me a drink (he took my joke seriously when I kidding about buying me a drink, such a gentlemen). He even accompanied me around, and tried forcing me to eat. HAHAHA, omg, I made him feel so bloated HAHAHAHAHA. This is embarrassing to admit but I'm legitimately smiling so fondly at the memory right now. :$ Like, I remember teasing him about something and then he tried chasing after me while I ran around a group of friends of mine (we happened to bump into each other at the time). He didn't catch me though so. :3 HAHAHAHA. But yeah, he even accompanied me when I had to go back to meet up with my parents! (To the person who knows what I'm talking about, I'm actually so sorry for ditching you and making you stand alone at the time. D:) When I finished with meeting up with my parents I went back to him and started teasing him over something. I think this was after I met up with one of my other friends again. But I started teasing him again before he started tackling me and back hugging me. At this point, I was squealing and laughing and smiling. Then my crush goes: "I was actually waiting to do this on my birthday but, will you go out with me?" Before I could even say anything, one of my classmate comes and kills the vibe instantly. HAHAHAHAHAHA. OMG, SO FUNNY BUT EMBARRASSING AS. HAHAHAHA. "Is she your little birdie?" He says. Omg. HAHAHAHAHAHAH. But nonetheless I said yes! So I was really happy for the rest of the night hehe. When it was time for me to go, he hugged me and actually tried picking me up! I was in a dress at the time so I said "please don't". To be honest, I probably wouldn't have let him try either way since I was so self-conscious about my weight and size at the time so yeah. :p 27/02. <3 So my school held an excursion to go see "Wicked" the musical and it was sooooo good! I swear to god I can just imagine the two main characters as Linh and Mimi. Not even kidding. HAHAHAHAHAHA. I like, wore my black dress and black boots... Only because one of my friend told me to wear it since she said she was gonna be the only one wearing a dress. Later, I found out that there was more. LOL. Oh, I applied make up for the first time EVER. And it took a hella long time. Man, I don't know how other girls can do this for so long. LOL. Funny thing is it wasn't even noticeable unless you look really close. :D We bought food and wth, it's so expensive i'm not even kidding. Four dollars for a bottle of water and seven dollars for a salad... that didn't even taste good at all. It was so plain and dry. T_T Like, the group of friends I was sitting with decided to mix it all up with something else, I think it was the dipping sauce and then they dared me to eat it. I did... And it tasted so weird. HAHAHA But despite the food tasting so bad, the night overall was pretty good. :) Then there were the exams and assessments holy snap. I don't even want to talk about those. Like, I had to take exams during the middle of another lesson and I got so stressed over music it isn't even funny. :c ----------- I would love to edit this but eh. Not bothered to post a year worth of stuff. It would be nice to have something to remember it by so I'll keep them simplified 'cause blogger doesn't accept long posts it would seem. :') And well, to be frank I can't remember them at all so I'm just basing it off my instagram photos HAHAHAHA On going term 1: - Outing with Ha, Thao, Tammy, Annie and Peter. Originally for formal which didn't happen. Karaoke where Thao lost her voice and I truly enjoyed the time with him. Lost my first kiss to him on the bus. Funny how it was only on half of my lips because I reacted weirdly (he grabbed my face) LOL. Was fun though - Got a new family member. Tofu the cat. Just imagine a slightly torched tofu. Yeah, that's her colour. Term two: - Had a UQ Japanese excursion. Sad moment how I was the only one in Corinda who was separated. I was by myself in a group of strangers. LOL. Had an activity where we could've came first but lost by a few minutes sadly. :( But it was eventful! - My wonderful English teacher got married! I prepared a little gift for her to which I hope she liked. It was a canvas with a painted ring (credits to me but credits to original artist since I copied it), "congratulations!" on the bottom and just words of congratulations all around it from our english class. Looking back at it now, it was a truly cute thing. - Athletics Day! Nearly ALL the captains dressed up and it was absolutely amazing. I went in my maid costume which was white - the colour for Moori. And it was funny because there were some teachers who were dissing me. "Is that really appropriate?" Umm. Miss? Please do that when I'm out of earshot thanks. :) - I got my Ls a day before the price went up so thank god. HAHAHA. But well, right now (six months+ later) I've only got two and a half hours so that isn't really good. :/ - Went out to celebrate Suzanne's birthday three days early. Out with Hannah, Eddy, Annie, Annie (Suzanne's cousin), Peter, Suzanne and another of Suzanne's cousin to who I forgot her name. Jessica was it? It was fun despite having to leave early. I got so mad at my dad for cutting my fun time short just because he wanted to go fishing. Lol. Still hate it when he thinks he can just my life for his means to be honest but eh. Nothing I can do about it. And thinking about it now, I guess I was hurt that Peter would leave me to go home by myself though. Lolol. Meh - Captains meeting at Hello Squirrel owned by one of my ex teachers: Mr Cullen. The food there is actually sooooooo goooooood! 11/10 would go back. We had a lot of planning done then so I was satisfied. On that day, I took out my siblings, cousin and brother's friends too and they just hung around in the city until I was finished. I just hope that they had fun though. From what I remember, we also watched a movie? Forgot what it was though but I swear it was good LOL Term three: - We got our senior jerseys! Got a picture with the other Vivian and Vi and we became the trio! Despite not hanging out at all with these two girls I really enjoyed calling them fellow triplets. You have to admit though, it was cool to see our jersey's name all next to each other. "VI NGUYEN | VIVIAN | TRAM-NGUYEN" It seriously looked so good. Hehe - Went to Creative Generation to support one of my classmates and then it turned out that one of my ex classmate who moved to another school was also one of the featured artists! I was sooooo proud! And the show was unexpected good too so I was happy and I don't regret going. - I had my first ever buddy to whom I must thank for. Thank you, Tsugumi-chan, for helping me build up my confidence by being your buddy. Thank you for cheerfulness, your smile and your adorable cluelessness. One day, I will go back to Nigata to meet you again. I'll try my best to. And while I'm at it, I'll probably visit my old host family too. - Movie night was so good! Although I did wish Peter was there and I do wish I should've expressed my annoyance at him for not going instead of just accepting it and saying it was okay but it's okay now. Lesson learnt. Funny how he said that he was scared that our leniency would ruin the relationship to which it did. This guy can predict the future. HAHAHA. Oh wells. I bought quite a lot of snacks to which we didn't even eat all of it. So I just brought it home and shared it with the family. - THEN THE FATEFUL DAY CAME. The day Peter broke up with me. Three days before our six months. So it ended on the 24 August. Heh, August. Reason why I don't like that month anymore despite it being my birth month. But eh, you can figure out what happened on from there. - Got my braces off! Yes! After two years, it felt soooooo good. HAHAHA And my smile in that photo's actually pretty good so heh. Term four: - I had another buddy: My Thai buddy, Paul or Pupha. Only reason I got another buddy was because no one in my class volunteered and my friend volunteered for me instead HAHAHA I don't mind it honestly but he's such a hard worker it's a pity that I can't help him that much. But he's surprising so good at maths - and the reason why is because they don't use calculators so I'm like "holy crap" HAHAHA - Multicultural night! I have a post about it but it doesn't expand and let's just say that despite technical difficulties we managed to finish on the exact time I predicted so that was hilarious. HAHAHA Everyone did an amazing job and I'm really proud of them. May it be the performers, food suppliers or helpers. It wouldn't have happened without the effort that they put in so I'm happy. - And then formal and graduation! To which you probably already all know about heh. Well. That pretty much sums up 2015 in one way or another LOL.
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#SleepyPhilosophy - 5. Love Saturday, 2 April 2016 | 0 Comment[s] "What is love?" "A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person." (Dictionary.com) But what's the point of calling it "love" when so many people in this generation get it mixed up with the thing called "lust"? Awhile ago, my friend told me that she came to the conclusion that lust is just a crush, a short term eye candy that you want. Whereas love is something deeper, something more meaningful. You want to create a future with that person. It's something that you can feel deep in the pits of your body. It's like an exhilaration of emotions whenever you talk to them; it's that shock whenever you touch them; it's that smile on your face whenever you think about them; it's when your heart just swells with this bubbly feeling whenever you see their smile. That, in my opinion, is when you're in love. But really, no one really "feels love" at the very start of the relationship. It takes perhaps months for it to go from "innocent crush" to "passionate affection". At the beginning of the relationship you haven't developed anything major just yet. Yes, you've entered a commitment with someone but the thing is that you haven't fully determined if they'll turn... "crazy" on you. You've yet to fully find out who that person is. People do have certain standards and when they find out that their current partner doesn't have the qualities that they want then they just... STEREOTYPICALLY lose feelings. They just don't like certain aspects of them so they slowly losing that affection that they held dearly for them. If you truly love someone you'll accept them wholeheartedly. Flaws and all. Perhaps there will be certain flaws that you can't accept and that's acceptable. That's okay. It's human to dislike things. But if you claim to stop liking a person just because you don't like certain aspects of them... Then you're not in love. Instead of losing feelings maybe you could've reminded them or reprimanded them that what they're doing is bad. Talk to them. Communication is a vital and the key to a healthy relationship. Just wholeheartedly accepting everything won't allow the relationship to progress and become stronger. It'll just become a standstill where you're just circling the experiences over and over again. In my opinion, relationships are there to help you grow and develop into a better person. That's why you need to be able to have those necessary fights no matter how awful they are - because those are the things that help us grow. So basically love is something that we fundamentally need because that is something that makes us human. For each and every person, they interpret it differently so perhaps, their vision of "love" is something different altogether. All I can say is that "love" is something we should all strive to find one day in our lives.
Requested by Mr. K.
#SleepyPhilosophy - 4. Family Saturday, 26 March 2016 | 0 Comment[s] "What's the important thing to have in a family?" For every individual they have a different definition of family and as a result the "most important thing" is different for everyone. It could be trust, belonging, commitment, bonds, help. From what I've been told having trust is the most important thing to have. Because with trust everything else runs much more smoothly. With trust the members of the "family" can believe in each other. Because we "trust" each other, we don't need to worry about what the other would do. We're not anxious because we "trust" them. We "trust" them to make us feel like we belong - like they're part of our family. But what if they broke that trust? Without thinking much of what they did the just... Broke it? It's like, figuratively, the wall that you had put up to keep people out - the wall that you had taken down specifically for them, was stomped on. All of a sudden you don't know what to do. This person you thought of as a family member were to suddenly turn your back on you, what do you do then? The thing is that people nowadays trust people too easily and as a result, when someone betrays them they develop what we call "trust issue". I'm not saying that it's wrong to trust people too easily but the thing is, in MY opinion, the whole "family" category that we put our friends in... Shouldn't be asked for. They should earn it. Like, there's no point in asking, "Oh, do you want to be part of the family?" There's really no reason in it. Because for one, if you're being asked to be "put into a family" you're joining your friend's circle of friends. Perhaps there's someone in there that you don't exactly get along with and you had intended to stay away from them but because you "accepted" to be "put into a family" you're now "family" with them. And then because of that you don't exactly know them too well - you don't know how they'd act or what they'd do. Sure you could "put them before you" but you don't know if they'd do the same for you. That's the issue with asking people for permission to be a "family". It's better off to just let it happen naturally. That way you'll get to know the person who you want to be part of your "family" and you'll just automatically connect. I'm just saying that in MY opinion, people shouldn't be too caught up with the family ordeal. Yeah, I know that people take things kind of things seriously - especially people who cherish bonds. And I get that. I understand that those kind of things makes them happy. But I'm just thinking that maybe, just maybe, don't do things with your heart on your sleeve because all that does is get hurt. I'm probably being biased 'cause of my past experience but with time, those kind of pain eventually fade away and you'll find new people as long as you choose to open up. There's no point in dwelling in the past. Just let it go.
Requested by Mr. K and Mr. EK.
#SleepyPhilosophy - 3. Lost Love Saturday, 19 March 2016 | 0 Comment[s] "Why do people want to go back to a relationship that they ended?" At first (normally for guys) it's because they miss that lack of support that was there. For guys, having a girl by their side is like an anchor for them. They support them, encouraged them and was always there at the end of the day if the boys ever needed someone to go to. And once that girl is gone all that's left is just emptiness. A certain void - the lack of having someone who understood yet never judged them. So when guys want to get back into a relationship that they once lost it's stereotypically because they just want someone to be there for them again. Because it's apparently "gay" to rant their feelings to other guys so the only choice is to turn to a girl. But boys have this mind set to keep cool and independent (usually) so they won't do it to just anyone. Only to their girl but what if their girl is gone? Then they want her back because they just want to fill in that emptiness. Likewise, when it's the girl who wants to get back it's generally something similar to what guys want. But they miss the comfort instead, the love that they received, the special treatment that they got. They want to fill that loneliness that they could only a partner could give. They want to create more memories together with the partner - because if it's one thing that a girl treasures (as long as they have a clean break up without any poisonous feelings) then it's the memories. The time and effort that they've given to someone is irreplaceable. But overall, there could be other factors that could contribute in wanting a past lover back. And that, is something that we, as a human, cannot control. Especially our emotions. And heart.
Requested by Mr. K.
#SleepyPhilosophy - 2. Void Wednesday, 9 March 2016 | 0 Comment[s] How do people deal with the emptiness inside them? Alright. I have some friends who I'd like to write this post for. Mr. E.K and Mr. D who doesn't blog anymore and just left his own blog quite dead. First of all when we lose something we have this emptiness inside of us - something that used to be filled with whatever that we lost. May it be love, trust or respect. It's mainly love so I'll focus on that in this case. Sure you can do many things to fill up that void. You can go around making girls fall for you left and right, filling up that hole only temporarily only to lose it all over again when you're done playing around. That void inside you just can't be filled up by something that can be easily lost. Things that we place within ourselves are generally things that are genuine and hard to acquire. It's like trying to fix a brick wall with wooden planks. What's the point of doing that if the enemy can easily charge straight through? I won't say that time won't heal it but it will close it only just a bit. Do you know why? Because during those times you would've gained new experiences, made new memories with friends, discovered new hobbies. All these things that can contribute into closing that gap. Sure you can find other things to temporarily close it but what's the point if it reopens again? That's the problem with temporary solutions. They only last for so long whereas memories and experiences are things that are usually kept for a long time (unless you forget easily then I can't help you with that sadly). Now, what's the point of trying to fill that gap inside of you if what you're doing is only making it hurt even more? There's no point. You're just doubling your pain. All I can say is stop because the love you want isn't just there. You'll need to accept it and move on. It'll be hard like hell (it always will be) but that strengthens your heart. There's honestly no point in doing whatever you're doing to fill up that abyss if it's just causing more pain 'cause it'll also affect not only your mental state but also your physical state. The pain makes us not want to eat. It'll make our body weaker. Although the brain and body says "yes, we need this" the heart says no because whenever you're in pain it's generally the heart that takes the brute of it. All I can really say is to find things to not temporarily fill the WHOLE void up but things that will permanently close it - just by a slither is fine. And if it hurts then stop. There's no point in hurting you even more. It'll hurt now but gradually over time you will make it as "there's always light at the end of the tunnel". #SleepyPhilosophy - 1. People Sunday, 28 February 2016 | 0 Comment[s] "What if people could understand each other?" You know, it would be nice if people could understand each other. If they did then we wouldn't have to deal with all the misunderstandings; we wouldn't have to fight; we wouldn't have to hurt others; the suicide rate would be so much more lower. If people could then discrimination wouldn't happen. But we can't because that's how society is. In order to make one feel better of themselves they usually put another one down. All this fighting is utter nonsense if they serve no purpose. For example, what's the point of making all this stuff up just because you don't want that person to come along? Just be straight up about it and the latter party can try to be understanding. Things like that serve no purpose because not only are you making the other party look bad, you're unknowingly giving yourself a bad name once people find out that what all you said was utter lies. There's just no point in doing that. It would be so much more lovely if people could understand each other. Then they would know if there's a certain line they must not cross — resulting in less anger-filled world. I won't say that anger will be gone but it will be subsided. There wouldn't be as much grudges as there are now. If people they could understand each other than there would be less people on the streets - people would be more giving. They'd understand what would happen. Maybe they could be: "Oh, I understand that you couldn't do anything about being unemployed. I understand that it's hard to do the things you want if you're living off others' scraps. Oh, here's some money to help make your life a bit easier." Sparing a bit of money isn't hard to do. Maybe just a dollar or two can buy them a meal. If people could understand each other then they would know how hard it would be to living on the streets, under perhaps a park bench with everyone else looking down their noses at you. If you want faith to be restored in humanity then maybe it should begin with you. But then again, if you think about it. How do relationships grow? It's through fighting and then reaching a mutual understanding where one's relationship will become stronger. Because if you fight then sure, it'll seem like a painful thing but the end result is that your relationship will be better as a result since you'll know that person better. Fights are where people can get a better look at the other at a deeper level. Fighting has two outcomes: for the better or for the worst. Let me take couples for example. They can fight and fight but what's the point of fighting if their relationship doesn't grow? What's the point if they don't reach a consensus? If they just fight without any solid result then they're just hurting themselves. Result? They split, looking for other people to give their heart to. But that's for the worst. If they fought and reached an agreement then their bond will grow. And who knows, maybe it'll reach the point where they'll tie the knot. And from my point of view, personally? Fighting is necessary in order to keep a relationship strong, stable and not... "tedious" in some cases. So don't fight for no reason but fight when it's necessary. It's okay to be understanding and accepting but if you do it all the time... It'll just be the same repeat over and over again.
Suggested by Mr. K.
#SleepyPhilosophy Saturday, 20 February 2016 | 0 Comment[s] Alrightiooooo. So I got suggested to do this thing where I post deep stuff on my blog and while I was giving advice to my friend, I was quite sleepy so I came up with that headline HAHAHAHA So starting from now I'll post some "deep" stuff once a week or something like depending if I get any prompts because well, I can't type on the whim. I need a reason otherwise my brain doesn't function quite well. So if you have any suggestions just comment in that box towards your left... Yeah, that blue one right there, and I'll check it and I'll post something in relation to it. :) But in other news, this new template took me two-three hours to finish. Well, three but I took a shower so it's two HAHAHA. But seriously, I need help. I've dug a hole too deep for this person. Even surgery at this rate won't be able to save me. HAHAHAHA Much love for him <3 幸せ // 2015 Thursday, 18 February 2016 | 0 Comment[s] Happiness. // 2015
So like, hey. It's been awhile since I've posted anything on here really. I felt like updating today to be honest but then again... By "today" it'll just end up being updating bits and pieces then posting the post days, weeks if not months later. HAHAHAHA. Oh wells, it's a bad habit you should be able to recognise now. (・ω・)ノ
Firstly, let's start off with a summary of term one. Despite it only being one term, it was flat out hectic! I think it was the second week of school? But we had swimming carnival. For that day I wore my incomplete Meiko costume and because I forgot my belt, I couldn't adjust the height of my skirt. :( It honestly was too high for my liking but luckily, I had bike shorts 'cause I got told a week later I think, that it was really up high. LOL.
School photos in the same week. It's funny because it's the last year so people would normally think that I'd try harder for the school photos. Heh, funny joke I got so lazy so I just tied it up and left it like that and took a really messy photo. But then again, we had really bad photographers this year so yeah LMFAO.
There was Valentines' Day next. It was so busy selling roses. I eventually lost majority of my break selling and thus didn't get to eat much really. However, it was all worth it when we sold nearly all of it. :) The process of wrapping them up, sorting them out as well were extremely stressful! But we eventually finished, two hours at least faster than the previous year which I personally think was a huge achievement considering it only took us four hours!! So good! Good job to everyone who was there but like everyone else has said: Shout out to my little sister for wrapping up approximately 400 roses! Little does she know, and I may not show it, but I'm proud of this little one. Especially with her achievements and all. :')
Leaders' Retreat happened and I must say, I do somewhat regret it considering that I missed out on two days of school. Considering that the Thursday consists of all my core subjects of Maths B, Chemistry, English and Maths A. D: It didn't help that I also missed out on Friday's maths b either. I had to really catch up. And the funny thing was that I am pretty sure that I am the only one out of the whole leaders' retreat who brought homework to camp. HAHAHAHAHA. But hey, it was interesting to know that I was the only one cooped up in their room for half the time trying to rewrite notes for Chemistry. LOLOL. Then again... I kind of wanted to play pool... :( But we did do a lot of activities at the retreat and they were really cool! Took a whole bunch of photos with the girls in my cabin through Phuong-Uyen's camera (holy crap dude. I am in so much LMFAO). She like, took one of me in the process of tying up my hair and to be frank... It's kind of embarrassing really. Because like, I guess it's because you can see my outline? LOL. I dunno, I just get embarrassed to those type of things yet I don't get embarrassed from flashing people. Oh gees, something is most definitely wrong with me. LOL. But all in all, I made friends with my two favourite girls in grade eight: Lili and Yifei!! They're two such cutie patooties. Seriously. The food there was alright really, sometimes better than I expected, sometimes worse than I expected. Oh, there was a time where I was jumping up and down 'cause I was feeling bloated right? Next thing I know it, I had a whole line following suit. So weird yet strangely hilarious. :') At night when we were meant to all sleep... We didn't sleep. LOL. The girls in my cabin started a deep and meaningful conversation circle and I must say, it really did get emotional. Haha. I told them about my past relationship 'cause I guess I kind of wanted to see if I could get it off my chest if I could say it out loud... And it helped, despite it leaving me somewhat choking at the end. HAHAHA. But one of the girls were like "But that's in the past right? Do you like someone now?" My response... "To be honest, I think I do..." But thinking about it now, I was in that phase where I really did have a thing for him. Totemo hazukashii desu. But it's true. 'Cause I couldn't not stop talking to him at the retreat until 12 and I had to force myself to go to sleep. HAHAHAHA. Embarrassingly, I went to sleep with a smile that night. :$ But during the retreat, it was raining quite heavily to the point that we were at risk of getting flooded so we had to go home about a hour earlier than usual. We got back, and I crashed my Japanese class. Literally jumped onto the window and went: "HI GUYSSSS!" HAHAHAHAHA. SCARED THEM SO BAD :D. Was so much fun. And then it was home time. Oh, I kinda teased my crush at the time after school and was like: "Where's my welcome back hug huh?" His response: "I would've, except your mum was there." Made me smile. Hehe. :3 But yeaaahhhh. All in all, I don't regret going to the Leaders' Retreat, I just wished that they had put it at a better time considering it was in the middle of term. :(
The following event that I'm going to describe now is something that I'm going to hold really dear to me so it gets its very own paragraph hehe. So basically: 27 February, it was Tet. Normally I wouldn't expect much but I this year I hung out with a couple of friends (we went on rides and stuff) before I eventually ditched them. :') Sorry guys. The reason why I ditched them was because of my crush. I kind of forced him to come sooooo... HAHAHA. :$ Umm, so basically we hung out after he went to go buy me a drink (he took my joke seriously when I kidding about buying me a drink, such a gentlemen). He even accompanied me around, and tried forcing me to eat. HAHAHA, omg, I made him feel so bloated HAHAHAHAHA. This is embarrassing to admit but I'm legitimately smiling so fondly at the memory right now. :$ Like, I remember teasing him about something and then he tried chasing after me while I ran around a group of friends of mine (we happened to bump into each other at the time). He didn't catch me though so. :3 HAHAHAHA. But yeah, he even accompanied me when I had to go back to meet up with my parents! (To the person who knows what I'm talking about, I'm actually so sorry for ditching you and making you stand alone at the time. D:) When I finished with meeting up with my parents I went back to him and started teasing him over something. I think this was after I met up with one of my other friends again. But I started teasing him again before he started tackling me and back hugging me. At this point, I was squealing and laughing and smiling. Then my crush goes: "I was actually waiting to do this on my birthday but, will you go out with me?" Before I could even say anything, one of my classmate comes and kills the vibe instantly. HAHAHAHAHAHA. OMG, SO FUNNY BUT EMBARRASSING AS. HAHAHAHA. "Is she your little birdie?" He says. Omg. HAHAHAHAHAHAH. But nonetheless I said yes! So I was really happy for the rest of the night hehe. When it was time for me to go, he hugged me and actually tried picking me up! I was in a dress at the time so I said "please don't". To be honest, I probably wouldn't have let him try either way since I was so self-conscious about my weight and size at the time so yeah. :p 27/02. <3 So my school held an excursion to go see "Wicked" the musical and it was sooooo good! I swear to god I can just imagine the two main characters as Linh and Mimi. Not even kidding. HAHAHAHAHAHA. I like, wore my black dress and black boots... Only because one of my friend told me to wear it since she said she was gonna be the only one wearing a dress. Later, I found out that there was more. LOL. Oh, I applied make up for the first time EVER. And it took a hella long time. Man, I don't know how other girls can do this for so long. LOL. Funny thing is it wasn't even noticeable unless you look really close. :D We bought food and wth, it's so expensive i'm not even kidding. Four dollars for a bottle of water and seven dollars for a salad... that didn't even taste good at all. It was so plain and dry. T_T Like, the group of friends I was sitting with decided to mix it all up with something else, I think it was the dipping sauce and then they dared me to eat it. I did... And it tasted so weird. HAHAHA But despite the food tasting so bad, the night overall was pretty good. :) Then there were the exams and assessments holy snap. I don't even want to talk about those. Like, I had to take exams during the middle of another lesson and I got so stressed over music it isn't even funny. :c ----------- I would love to edit this but eh. Not bothered to post a year worth of stuff. It would be nice to have something to remember it by so I'll keep them simplified 'cause blogger doesn't accept long posts it would seem. :') And well, to be frank I can't remember them at all so I'm just basing it off my instagram photos HAHAHAHA On going term 1: - Outing with Ha, Thao, Tammy, Annie and Peter. Originally for formal which didn't happen. Karaoke where Thao lost her voice and I truly enjoyed the time with him. Lost my first kiss to him on the bus. Funny how it was only on half of my lips because I reacted weirdly (he grabbed my face) LOL. Was fun though - Got a new family member. Tofu the cat. Just imagine a slightly torched tofu. Yeah, that's her colour. Term two: - Had a UQ Japanese excursion. Sad moment how I was the only one in Corinda who was separated. I was by myself in a group of strangers. LOL. Had an activity where we could've came first but lost by a few minutes sadly. :( But it was eventful! - My wonderful English teacher got married! I prepared a little gift for her to which I hope she liked. It was a canvas with a painted ring (credits to me but credits to original artist since I copied it), "congratulations!" on the bottom and just words of congratulations all around it from our english class. Looking back at it now, it was a truly cute thing. - Athletics Day! Nearly ALL the captains dressed up and it was absolutely amazing. I went in my maid costume which was white - the colour for Moori. And it was funny because there were some teachers who were dissing me. "Is that really appropriate?" Umm. Miss? Please do that when I'm out of earshot thanks. :) - I got my Ls a day before the price went up so thank god. HAHAHA. But well, right now (six months+ later) I've only got two and a half hours so that isn't really good. :/ - Went out to celebrate Suzanne's birthday three days early. Out with Hannah, Eddy, Annie, Annie (Suzanne's cousin), Peter, Suzanne and another of Suzanne's cousin to who I forgot her name. Jessica was it? It was fun despite having to leave early. I got so mad at my dad for cutting my fun time short just because he wanted to go fishing. Lol. Still hate it when he thinks he can just my life for his means to be honest but eh. Nothing I can do about it. And thinking about it now, I guess I was hurt that Peter would leave me to go home by myself though. Lolol. Meh - Captains meeting at Hello Squirrel owned by one of my ex teachers: Mr Cullen. The food there is actually sooooooo goooooood! 11/10 would go back. We had a lot of planning done then so I was satisfied. On that day, I took out my siblings, cousin and brother's friends too and they just hung around in the city until I was finished. I just hope that they had fun though. From what I remember, we also watched a movie? Forgot what it was though but I swear it was good LOL Term three: - We got our senior jerseys! Got a picture with the other Vivian and Vi and we became the trio! Despite not hanging out at all with these two girls I really enjoyed calling them fellow triplets. You have to admit though, it was cool to see our jersey's name all next to each other. "VI NGUYEN | VIVIAN | TRAM-NGUYEN" It seriously looked so good. Hehe - Went to Creative Generation to support one of my classmates and then it turned out that one of my ex classmate who moved to another school was also one of the featured artists! I was sooooo proud! And the show was unexpected good too so I was happy and I don't regret going. - I had my first ever buddy to whom I must thank for. Thank you, Tsugumi-chan, for helping me build up my confidence by being your buddy. Thank you for cheerfulness, your smile and your adorable cluelessness. One day, I will go back to Nigata to meet you again. I'll try my best to. And while I'm at it, I'll probably visit my old host family too. - Movie night was so good! Although I did wish Peter was there and I do wish I should've expressed my annoyance at him for not going instead of just accepting it and saying it was okay but it's okay now. Lesson learnt. Funny how he said that he was scared that our leniency would ruin the relationship to which it did. This guy can predict the future. HAHAHA. Oh wells. I bought quite a lot of snacks to which we didn't even eat all of it. So I just brought it home and shared it with the family. - THEN THE FATEFUL DAY CAME. The day Peter broke up with me. Three days before our six months. So it ended on the 24 August. Heh, August. Reason why I don't like that month anymore despite it being my birth month. But eh, you can figure out what happened on from there. - Got my braces off! Yes! After two years, it felt soooooo good. HAHAHA And my smile in that photo's actually pretty good so heh. Term four: - I had another buddy: My Thai buddy, Paul or Pupha. Only reason I got another buddy was because no one in my class volunteered and my friend volunteered for me instead HAHAHA I don't mind it honestly but he's such a hard worker it's a pity that I can't help him that much. But he's surprising so good at maths - and the reason why is because they don't use calculators so I'm like "holy crap" HAHAHA - Multicultural night! I have a post about it but it doesn't expand and let's just say that despite technical difficulties we managed to finish on the exact time I predicted so that was hilarious. HAHAHA Everyone did an amazing job and I'm really proud of them. May it be the performers, food suppliers or helpers. It wouldn't have happened without the effort that they put in so I'm happy. - And then formal and graduation! To which you probably already all know about heh. Well. That pretty much sums up 2015 in one way or another LOL.
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 Occupation: Student Currently: Dying |