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#SleepyPhilosophy - 4. Family Saturday 26 March 2016 | 0 comment[s] "What's the important thing to have in a family?" For every individual they have a different definition of family and as a result the "most important thing" is different for everyone. It could be trust, belonging, commitment, bonds, help. From what I've been told having trust is the most important thing to have. Because with trust everything else runs much more smoothly. With trust the members of the "family" can believe in each other. Because we "trust" each other, we don't need to worry about what the other would do. We're not anxious because we "trust" them. We "trust" them to make us feel like we belong - like they're part of our family. But what if they broke that trust? Without thinking much of what they did the just... Broke it? It's like, figuratively, the wall that you had put up to keep people out - the wall that you had taken down specifically for them, was stomped on. All of a sudden you don't know what to do. This person you thought of as a family member were to suddenly turn your back on you, what do you do then? The thing is that people nowadays trust people too easily and as a result, when someone betrays them they develop what we call "trust issue". I'm not saying that it's wrong to trust people too easily but the thing is, in MY opinion, the whole "family" category that we put our friends in... Shouldn't be asked for. They should earn it. Like, there's no point in asking, "Oh, do you want to be part of the family?" There's really no reason in it. Because for one, if you're being asked to be "put into a family" you're joining your friend's circle of friends. Perhaps there's someone in there that you don't exactly get along with and you had intended to stay away from them but because you "accepted" to be "put into a family" you're now "family" with them. And then because of that you don't exactly know them too well - you don't know how they'd act or what they'd do. Sure you could "put them before you" but you don't know if they'd do the same for you. That's the issue with asking people for permission to be a "family". It's better off to just let it happen naturally. That way you'll get to know the person who you want to be part of your "family" and you'll just automatically connect. I'm just saying that in MY opinion, people shouldn't be too caught up with the family ordeal. Yeah, I know that people take things kind of things seriously - especially people who cherish bonds. And I get that. I understand that those kind of things makes them happy. But I'm just thinking that maybe, just maybe, don't do things with your heart on your sleeve because all that does is get hurt. I'm probably being biased 'cause of my past experience but with time, those kind of pain eventually fade away and you'll find new people as long as you choose to open up. There's no point in dwelling in the past. Just let it go.
Requested by Mr. K and Mr. EK.
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